Relationship OCD: Understanding & Overcoming Doubt in Love 

April Vass • February 28, 2025
Pink tulips in a clear glass pitcher on a wooden table, with a blurred blue background.

Love should feel joyful, but if your mind is caught in a loop of “What if?”—constantly doubting your feelings or your partner—you might be experiencing Relationship OCD (ROCD) .

ROCD can make even the happiest relationships feel uncertain. However, the good news is that Relationship OCD is treatable , and with the right support, you can break free from the cycle of doubt.

What Is Relationship OCD (ROCD)?

Relationship OCD (ROCD) is a form of Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder that involves intrusive thoughts about your relationship, partner, or feelings of doubt regarding love. People with ROCD feel compelled to seek certainty about their relationships, often leading to anxiety and confusion.

Two Common Types of ROCD

Relationship-Centered ROCD Examples of intrusive thoughts include:

  • “What if I don’t love them enough?”
  • “Is this the right relationship for me?”
  • Constantly comparing your relationship to others.

Partner-Focused ROCD Examples of intrusive thoughts include:

  • “Are they attractive enough?”
  • “They do this one annoying thing—can I live with it?”
  • Fixating on their flaws and questioning your compatibility.

How to Break Free from ROCD: ERP vs. I-CBT

Exposure & Response Prevention (ERP)

ERP helps you face uncertainty without engaging in compulsive behaviors (e.g., reassurance-seeking, analyzing, or checking). You learn to tolerate the discomfort of doubt without trying to resolve it.

Example: Instead of analyzing your love for your partner, you learn to let the doubt exist without trying to solve it.

Inference-Based Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (I-CBT)

I-CBT helps you recognize that ROCD thoughts are false alarms and not meaningful indicators of real problems. This therapy enables you to step out of the OCD bubble to focusing on the here and now.

Example: Instead of believing: “If I notice someone attractive, maybe I’m in the wrong relationship,” I-CBT helps you see that this thought isn’t actually meaningful.

Healing from ROCD: You Deserve Love Without the Loop

ROCD can make love feel like a constant puzzle, but healing is possible . You don’t have to navigate this journey alone— our clinicians specialize in ERP and I-CBT and are here to guide you toward a healthier, more fulfilling relationship. Ready to start healing? Schedule an appointment today.

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